The right moment is well worth the wait.

Be patient...
Be discipline...
Because that decisive moment is well worth the wait. 

-Nguyen Pham 

I truly learn the lesson of patience this year the hard way. As i force myself to forget Jonathan, I ended hurting myself further and I was just using one boy after another to just try to feel something again, to forget about Jonathan, to forget about how I feel when I'm with him. Unfortunately, I didn't feel anything, just empty and hollow inside. I mean What am I kidding? 

The thing is it was just a giant hollow empty feeling after all. So yeah, once again i'm stupid, and nope, not just one, more than one, more like 100 or so. And you know what, it's not worth it. It's not worth it at all.

I finally learn that I need to take a break to be with myself, I need to really be with myself, learn to be by myself, I've always been with somebody and it's just for the wrong reason, just going from one rebound to the other, which is yeah, just doesnt do me any good.

 

I learn that I need to learn to have a good relationship with myself, because at the end of the day, if I truly have a great relationship with myself, after all, that's all it matter. When everything falls, the one relationship that truly matter is the relationship I have with myself. And i feel like i've been lying to myself, hiding from my feelings cos I couldn't man enough to face the way I feel about myself. 

The thing with Tyson was totally a wake up call and today after I told him how I truly feel about him was so good, I feel like I finally be true to myself again, to face up with myself and not just being diplomatic but really tell the jerk how i feel about him, that was way good. I'm on my way to being true to myself and so far it feels so good.:)

So I'm off to bed now and I'm gonna make sure I'm keep writing this everyday to make sure that I'm on the right path.

I really like the photography group and I feel like I learn a lot and tomorrow I'm gonna get up early to go take pics at Pounders :)

I wanna shout to myself just how much I love myself :)

xoxoxo

 

How can you be happier?

1. Spend time with the “right people.”  Sounds simple. But who exactly are the right people? Unfortunately, they’re generally not your office mates, who are the ones people tend to spend the most time with. The people that make you happiest will generally be friends, family, and romantic partners. That’s why one the most powerful influencers of general happiness is whether or not someone has a “best friend” at work and whether or not they like their boss.

• Avoid small talk. A related predictor of happiness is how much substantive discussion a person engages in, compared to small talk. Generally, small talk makes people unhappy, and often, work relationships involve a disproportionate amount of small talk. If you want to increase your happiness, it’s far better to find one or two colleagues with whom you can have a real discussion than to engage in small talk around the water cooler.

2. Spend time on “socially connecting” activities, such as volunteering and spending time with friends.

• Work doesn’t count. Unless your job is particularly fulfilling and your colleagues are your best buds, work is not ’socially connecting’ and is generally one of the more unhappy parts of the day. Commuting is also gets high marks for making people unhappy.
• Volunteering has been proven to be a good way to increase happiness.
• Memory is important, because it helps us take an event that happened in the past and extend its ‘worth’ into the future.  One way to help choose experiences that will increase happiness is to consider how you might remember them in the future. What are your happiest memories? How might you create more similar memories?

3. Day dream, or, as the researchers say, enjoy the experience without spending the time. As counterintuitive as it may seem, research has shown that the part of the brain responsible for feeling pleasure can be activated just by thinking about something pleasurable. And we often enjoy the anticipation of something pleasurable more than the actual experience that we think is going to be so great. The most common example is vacation planning, which some find more pleasurable than the vacation itself.
4. Expand your time. No, this does not mean you have to find a warp in the space-time continuum (although it might help). Focusing on the “here and now” slows down the perceived passage of time, allowing people to feel less rushed and hurried. How can we do that?

• Breathe slowly. Just for a few minutes.  As the authors write: “In one study, subjects who were instructed to take long and slow breaths (vs. short and quick ones) for 5 minutes not only felt there was more time available to get things done, but also perceived their day to be longer.”
• Volunteering makes it seem like you have more time. In general, spending time on someone else makes people feel like they have more spare time and that their future is more expansive.
• Pay people to do the chores you hate. Activities that we choose to do generally make us happier than those that are obligatory. So if you can afford it, hire someone else to do some of the ‘obligatory’ tasks, such as cleaning the house. Then use the time you’ve ‘bought’ not to catch up on work, but to do something you genuinely enjoy.

5. Be aware that aging changes the way people experience happiness. Youths tend to equate happiness with excitement, but as people get older, happiness is associated with feeling peaceful. Young people get more happiness from spending time with interesting new acquaintances, while older people get more enjoyment from spending time with close friends and family.

(Study from Jennifer L. Aaker- a marketing professor at Stanford University’s School of Business, Melanie Rudd- Stanford MBA student, and Cassie Mogilner-Wharton marketing professor) 

 me- doing the things that make me happy:)